Newsflash: Prescott is PM
By Graham Davies
Congratulations to Gordon Brown. He wins the monthly John Prescott Memorial Prize for Unintelligible Speechmaking for the following sentence delivered yesterday:
"Or we could view the threats and challenges we face today as the difficult birth-pangs of a new global order, and our task now as nothing less than making the transition through a new internationalism to the benefits of an expanding global society, not muddling through as pessimists but making the necessary adjustment to a better future and setting the new rules for this new global order."
My Rules of Presentation Order state that the more complex the issue you are talking about, the more simple the speech has to be. Essentially: Say it, Support it, Shut it.
Not all of us have Gordon’s academic background. We shouldn’t need one to be able to follow what our Prime Minister is saying.
Tuesday, 27 January 2009
Barack's 24hr Transformation
By Graham Davies
The dust has settled: time for a measured judgement on Barack’s speech.
He had to show that he was a Doer as well as a Dreamer. And he just about managed it.
After only just surviving the plot initiated by George Bush and executed by the Chief Justice to make him fluff the oath, the speech got off to a stiff and slow start. We knew that he had to dampen high expectations just a little, but the first minute or two was very bland fare indeed.
But then the Obama Presentation Machine kicked in. This time he had decided he was driving a Bentley, not a Ferrari. The pauses were long and his voice tone was lofty. The intimate style that he uses in front of small audiences (300,000 or less) was gone. It’s hard to be engagingly warm with each member of an audience of 2 million people.
His real achievement was in being specific. This was an exercise in practical prose, not soaring poetry. He had some clever phrases (“we will reach out our hand if you will unclench your fist”) and he avoided “Yes We Can” platitudes. His micro-message was deliberately business-like: “it is time to get up, dust ourselves down and get on with the business of re-building our country”.
The key moment for me involved quite a pointed dig at his immediate predecessor, when he said “we reject the false choice between our safety and our ideals”. The real test for this speech was whether the noble ideas could translate into practical actions. When he suspended trials at Guantanamo Bay the very next day, he made an unequivocal statement of intent. Barack, man of vision, immediately became Barack, man of decision.
Now all he has to do is end two wars, broker a settlement in the Middle East, fix the economy, rescue the environment and create a credible Health Service.
By Graham Davies
The dust has settled: time for a measured judgement on Barack’s speech.
He had to show that he was a Doer as well as a Dreamer. And he just about managed it.
After only just surviving the plot initiated by George Bush and executed by the Chief Justice to make him fluff the oath, the speech got off to a stiff and slow start. We knew that he had to dampen high expectations just a little, but the first minute or two was very bland fare indeed.
But then the Obama Presentation Machine kicked in. This time he had decided he was driving a Bentley, not a Ferrari. The pauses were long and his voice tone was lofty. The intimate style that he uses in front of small audiences (300,000 or less) was gone. It’s hard to be engagingly warm with each member of an audience of 2 million people.
His real achievement was in being specific. This was an exercise in practical prose, not soaring poetry. He had some clever phrases (“we will reach out our hand if you will unclench your fist”) and he avoided “Yes We Can” platitudes. His micro-message was deliberately business-like: “it is time to get up, dust ourselves down and get on with the business of re-building our country”.
The key moment for me involved quite a pointed dig at his immediate predecessor, when he said “we reject the false choice between our safety and our ideals”. The real test for this speech was whether the noble ideas could translate into practical actions. When he suspended trials at Guantanamo Bay the very next day, he made an unequivocal statement of intent. Barack, man of vision, immediately became Barack, man of decision.
Now all he has to do is end two wars, broker a settlement in the Middle East, fix the economy, rescue the environment and create a credible Health Service.
Monday, 26 January 2009
Jonathan Who?
By Graham Davies
I was going to write something about whether Jonathan Ross said something offensive about someone old on some radio show he was presenting.
However, I've just re-decorated my kitchen wall, the paint's drying, and I want to watch it. Far more stimulating.
Perhaps one day soon, the BBC will realise that JR continually commits the cardinal crime of anyone who is too pleased with his own persona, and even after an involuntary break, he still isn’t funny.
By Graham Davies
I was going to write something about whether Jonathan Ross said something offensive about someone old on some radio show he was presenting.
However, I've just re-decorated my kitchen wall, the paint's drying, and I want to watch it. Far more stimulating.
Perhaps one day soon, the BBC will realise that JR continually commits the cardinal crime of anyone who is too pleased with his own persona, and even after an involuntary break, he still isn’t funny.
Death of the Dynasty?
By Graham Davies
Americans love royalty. This is a country which is only 230 years old, so people yearn for a sense of history and a feeling of continuity.
They can’t have kings, queens, princes, princesses, lords and ladies and all the pomp and circumstance and in-breeding and strange rituals that attach. So they’ve evolved the next best thing: the dynasty.
At one point last year, the presidency from 1988-2012 could have ended up as the revolving possession of just two dynasties – Bush and Clinton. It turned out that Clinton Mark 2 was considered too petty and aggressive to be President. So she has been appointed Secretary of State instead.
Now we have news that another dynasty has failed in its attempt to maintain profile, popularity and power. Caroline Kennedy (the only surviving child of John and Jackie) will NOT be the next Senator for New York.
She withdrew from consideration, apparently, for “personal reasons”. More relevantly, she has a shy manner, a weak voice that gets weaker under pressure and a Palin-like inability to answer tricky questions on TV. Her presentation skills are just not up to it.
It’s nice to see the American establishment realising that suitability and competence are more important than surname.
If only they’d had the good sense to think that way in 2001. The world would have been a very different and probably a far safer place.
By Graham Davies
Americans love royalty. This is a country which is only 230 years old, so people yearn for a sense of history and a feeling of continuity.
They can’t have kings, queens, princes, princesses, lords and ladies and all the pomp and circumstance and in-breeding and strange rituals that attach. So they’ve evolved the next best thing: the dynasty.
At one point last year, the presidency from 1988-2012 could have ended up as the revolving possession of just two dynasties – Bush and Clinton. It turned out that Clinton Mark 2 was considered too petty and aggressive to be President. So she has been appointed Secretary of State instead.
Now we have news that another dynasty has failed in its attempt to maintain profile, popularity and power. Caroline Kennedy (the only surviving child of John and Jackie) will NOT be the next Senator for New York.
She withdrew from consideration, apparently, for “personal reasons”. More relevantly, she has a shy manner, a weak voice that gets weaker under pressure and a Palin-like inability to answer tricky questions on TV. Her presentation skills are just not up to it.
It’s nice to see the American establishment realising that suitability and competence are more important than surname.
If only they’d had the good sense to think that way in 2001. The world would have been a very different and probably a far safer place.
Monday, 19 January 2009
Dear Barack
By Graham Davies
I know you don’t read my blog every day. But if you get a moment, it’s crucial that you read the following before you do that speech tomorrow:
Dump ALL references to Lincoln. His second inauguration speech was blandly spineless. He said he had “neither the power nor the inclination to disturb slavery”. You have to break free from past mistakes. Don’t associate yourself with feeble compromise.
Do not quote Kennedy, Roosevelt, St Francis of Assisi or ANYONE else. If you’ve got something important to say (you have), then say it in your own words. The US people elected you to sort out their future, not to wallow in the past.
Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES should you try to start any audience participation. The "yes we can" massed chanting routine is embarrassing and demeaning for the leader of the Western World. You do not want to sound like 1992-vintage pre-election rally Neil Kinnock (“awright! awright!). This is not the time for Karaoke Speaking.
Include a highly specific plan of immediate action to give pragmatic reality to your lofty vision.
Speak for no more than 15 minutes because (a) otherwise you and everyone else will catch pneumonia and (b) that’s the maximum attention span of an audience of a million people who are all standing up. For a speech to be immortal, it does not have to be eternal.
Anyway. Best of British.
(PS - I will send the invoice under separate cover, if that’s OK. Usual terms).
By Graham Davies
I know you don’t read my blog every day. But if you get a moment, it’s crucial that you read the following before you do that speech tomorrow:
Dump ALL references to Lincoln. His second inauguration speech was blandly spineless. He said he had “neither the power nor the inclination to disturb slavery”. You have to break free from past mistakes. Don’t associate yourself with feeble compromise.
Do not quote Kennedy, Roosevelt, St Francis of Assisi or ANYONE else. If you’ve got something important to say (you have), then say it in your own words. The US people elected you to sort out their future, not to wallow in the past.
Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES should you try to start any audience participation. The "yes we can" massed chanting routine is embarrassing and demeaning for the leader of the Western World. You do not want to sound like 1992-vintage pre-election rally Neil Kinnock (“awright! awright!). This is not the time for Karaoke Speaking.
Include a highly specific plan of immediate action to give pragmatic reality to your lofty vision.
Speak for no more than 15 minutes because (a) otherwise you and everyone else will catch pneumonia and (b) that’s the maximum attention span of an audience of a million people who are all standing up. For a speech to be immortal, it does not have to be eternal.
Anyway. Best of British.
(PS - I will send the invoice under separate cover, if that’s OK. Usual terms).
Friday, 16 January 2009
Emergency Update: Flood Warning
By Graham Davies
Disturbing news for top fashion designers. Dolce & Gabana, Gucci, Yves Saint Laurent, Versace, Yohji Mamamoto and the like have just over one month to get together a range of stylish waterproofs.
Kate Winslet is up for two Oscars. Anyone in the vicinity will have to take precautions to avoid being drowned by gushing from the stage and vomit from the audience.
My eminently practical suggestion for the organisers is to print a programme featuring a full list of all the people each nominee would like to thank. On-screen subtitles should also be made available.
Then the winners will not have to say anything. And the audience can enjoy a basic human right: Freedom from Speech.
By Graham Davies
Disturbing news for top fashion designers. Dolce & Gabana, Gucci, Yves Saint Laurent, Versace, Yohji Mamamoto and the like have just over one month to get together a range of stylish waterproofs.
Kate Winslet is up for two Oscars. Anyone in the vicinity will have to take precautions to avoid being drowned by gushing from the stage and vomit from the audience.
My eminently practical suggestion for the organisers is to print a programme featuring a full list of all the people each nominee would like to thank. On-screen subtitles should also be made available.
Then the winners will not have to say anything. And the audience can enjoy a basic human right: Freedom from Speech.
Thursday, 15 January 2009
The Challenge for Obama
By Graham Davies
On Wednesday at 5pm GMT, Barrack Obama will walk the taughtest tightrope in the history of political public speaking.
His unique brand of personal presentation won him more votes than his policies. His speeches have inspired something in the American imagination that has not seemed recently possible: hope.
There is something about him that transcends cynicism. You can almost sense hard-bitten journalists wanting him to make their hearts melt. The Third Estate seem prepared to cut him more slack than they were any other incoming President.
But his delivery has not been matched by his specifics.
Of course, the shivering throng in DC will not want to listen to a list of tax proposals or a finely-calculated breakdown of Federal Infrastructure projects. But any lofty visions provided by his large team of writers will have to be brought down to earth by something memorable that will actually get done and not merely said.
This is not the time to out-do Kennedy’s vision that a man would walk on the moon by the end of the decade. Obama needs to be able to say that people will still have jobs at the end of the week.
“Yes we can” has to very quickly become “Yes we will definitely do this.”
By Graham Davies
On Wednesday at 5pm GMT, Barrack Obama will walk the taughtest tightrope in the history of political public speaking.
His unique brand of personal presentation won him more votes than his policies. His speeches have inspired something in the American imagination that has not seemed recently possible: hope.
There is something about him that transcends cynicism. You can almost sense hard-bitten journalists wanting him to make their hearts melt. The Third Estate seem prepared to cut him more slack than they were any other incoming President.
But his delivery has not been matched by his specifics.
Of course, the shivering throng in DC will not want to listen to a list of tax proposals or a finely-calculated breakdown of Federal Infrastructure projects. But any lofty visions provided by his large team of writers will have to be brought down to earth by something memorable that will actually get done and not merely said.
This is not the time to out-do Kennedy’s vision that a man would walk on the moon by the end of the decade. Obama needs to be able to say that people will still have jobs at the end of the week.
“Yes we can” has to very quickly become “Yes we will definitely do this.”
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